After days, weeks and now months of convincing myself that things will get better and that I will like it here and pretending and pushing myself hard to ignore myself, I broke. I crashed and was mentally, emotionally and as a result physically unhealthy. I have managed to upset and hurt my uber supportive boyfriend with my negativity and I looked like death for about a week (not a good look for a fashionista).
Long story short, I have come to terms and accepted the fact that my environment and surroundings will not change. I will not necessarily fall in love with my lifestyle here and there is little I can do to change the situation here, but what I can do, is change my attitude towards a shitty situation.
The reason for 5 weeks is- in 5 weeks from today, I will be going back home to Toronto to visit my lovely sister, my amazing boyfriend and wonderful friends for a full 3 weeks (where else but in Europe can you have full 3 weeks for a Christmas break). My challenge is to make those 5 weeks a time to focus on positivity and health through the following:
1)Keeping Busy with school and organizing outings for the week
2)Exercise- I love working out and so being hopped up on endorphins at least 4 times a week is not really all that hard
3)Health Food- I always try to eat healthy, but because I have this bad habit of "sharing a kitchen=not my own kitchen, therefore not gonna cook/ I don't want to cook for myself only" I have fallen off the wagon. I neglected fruits and vegetables and ate really random stuff.
4)Appearance- Who cares if people in Barcelona don't dress up or care to look good? My appearance is for myself.
5)No Drama. A promise I made to my boyfriend. I am lucky to have the most supportive man i've ever met by my side and I do not want my negativity to hurt him ever again. Even if I get sad, Drama will not be allowed.
Please join me and support me through my challenge. It is day 1 and I feel great.